Tying the knot can be a milestone event. After getting engaged, you and your partner will set out to plan your wedding. While this can seem straightforward enough, plenty of same-sex couples run into challenges. Many marital traditions are centered around heterosexual couples, which can make planning a bit more difficult for same-sex pairings. Luckily, you don’t need to stress too much. A little bit of guidance can help you navigate the planning process and discover simple answers that will tie your wedding together.

Give yourself a moment to explore some of these tips on how to plan a same-sex wedding. Once you have an idea of how to bend tradition, you’ll be ready to take on your big day with style.

Who Sits Where?

Some traditions are so subtle that many couples don’t consider them until later stages of planning have arrived. Even though you and your partner have probably spent many hours debating the seating arrangements for your reception, you may not have taken a moment to think about seating for the ceremony. In some circles, it is traditional for relatives of the bride to sit on one side of the ceremony venue and the relatives of the groom to sit on the opposite side. With a same-sex ceremony, guests may not be sure which side is the right side.

The easiest way to deal with this tradition is by breaking it entirely. Plenty of straight couples have done away with the bride-side/groom-side seating system, so it makes total sense for same-sex couples to try their own ideas. A quick search on Pinterest will reveal a number of clever signage ideas you can use to illustrate the seating arrangement to guests. One clever sign reads, “Choose a seat, not a side. We’re all family once the knot is tied.” Find a sentimental or silly verse to hang at the ceremony, and guests will find places to sit without hesitation.

Are Rainbows Mandatory?

This can seem like a silly question to some, but there are plenty of LGBT couples who wonder whether or not they need to include “gay imagery” at their weddings. The bright colors of the pride flag might be symbolic of the shared experiences of the gay community, but it doesn’t mean every couple is going to want to plaster their wedding with rainbows. When looking for same-sex wedding ideas online, you’re likely to run into a lot of bloggers and vendors who assume rainbows are mandatory.

Since this is your wedding, you don’t need to feel beholden to anyone else’s ideas except for those of your significant other. If you both feel strongly about including symbols of LGBT representation at your event, then go ahead! On the other hand, you don’t need to include any pride-related decor if it isn’t something that speaks to you. A wedding is a celebration of two people in love. As long as the event reflects this simple idea, there’s no need to feel pressured to include specific items. 

Responding to Outdated Mentalities

Finally, you may run into uncomfortable comments during your wedding. Even relatives who are “totally for gay marriage” can ask questions that make couples groan. The classic line of “so who’s the man and who’s the woman” is one most same-sex couples are familiar with. While you can go into the details of why the question doesn’t make sense, you may not want to get into frustrating debates on your big day. Instead, excuse yourself to speak with other guests, and try to keep yourself in a positive mindset.

There are bound to be plenty of questions you run into while planning for your big day. Take time to think about what’s best for you and your partner, and put together a wonderful celebration of your love.